My relationship with food has been very variant throughout my life. When I was a child I ate a lot, especially a lot of sweets & sugar. I was told if I ate up my food I would get a sweet afterwards. A treat. It didn’t matter if it was a big bowl of pasta or a few slices of bread. I ate it all. And demolished my treats after my meal. This resulted that I was a bit of a chubby child and developed dental problems(I do assume from all the sugar I consumed). At nearly age 24, I still need fillings every year..

From my early teenage years until now a lot have happened, and Im not going to go into detail, as you’ve probably heard all the stories about eating disorders before. But yes, I did have a bad relationship to food. As every story that begin with; I wanted to be skinny…
When I was about 15 years old, give or take, I started lifting, and was very blown away with all the bodybuilding information out there. I got a meal plan made up by someone at the gym and stuck to it for about two months. During those two months I lost about 10 kg. Today I find that very impressive, imagine giving a 15 year old girl today a whole food meal plan and tell her thats all she can eat? Not gonna happen, with some exceptions.

However, continued going to the gym for maybe another year or so, then completely stop. Why? I honestly cant remember. Although I do remember during that time I was actually quite thin. My diet wasn’t great, or very bad. But still not optimal. Another 3 years went past without much exercise or caring for my diet, then one day I said, somethings got to change. One extreme detox diet, to a keto diet went another 10 kg down and the passion for lifting and healthy living came back. About 6 months later I started working with a personal trainer, and before I knew it I was prepping for my first Bikini Fitness Competition(as you can read on earlier blogposts).

Today Im prepping for my second contest and are now getting a degree in Nutrition. Looking back 6 months to a year ago, I thought I knew a lot about nutrition, healthy living and bodybuilding. I couldn’t be more wrong. Everyday I read, research and learn new things, and Im always amazed. Being able to learn the science behind it, for me is a fantastic opportunity and very boring at the same time(note: Im not very academic of me.) What do I want to do with it? Time will tell, but this is one of many things Im passionate about. I do want to help, to inspire and to teach.

But what I wanted to say in this blogpost, is that supposing I am living a so called “fit life”, I know how to lose weight, get that six pack, eat healthy (although Ive still got plenty to learn) etc.. I have still not got a comfortable relationship with food. Im still on a learning curve to find out what is good for me, what is optimal for me and what my beliefs are. Embarrassing to say, but I can be one of those people who learn about one diet one week and think this is the best diet out there, then next week I find something else and imagine that one is even better because of x and y. As I said, Im still on a learning curve, will I find the best diet out there one day? Probably not. But one that is optimal for me? Yes.

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